Introducing....Mark 'Stanley™' Millward

Must dash to the Spurs game or I'll be late (2-0 to the Pool) but the pics I have covering MM in glory from the other night are below. A glorious final table visit and eventual 9th place finish in the 87 entrant £20 pot limit hold 'em ultra short stack maniac rebuy event is something to be proud of. At the Stanley casino, Manc - hence MM's poker nickname was born. We might hear about this for a number of decades to come.

An artists impression of what might have been, with
the real winners name kept on the top left for evidence
(suddenly thought that it might not be a good idea publishing

your signature on the t'intaweb MM, and couldn't resist
a few further small changes when editing...) .

One of life's winners. MM skillfully negotiated a £300 win in the end
with a final table deal. What a pro. A professional poker career beckons.

Legend and fellow loser in the kebab shop very early
in the morning post casino.

I can imagine this image adorning the pages of poker
player magazine. I might send it in.

MM with a big wedge, including the entry fees of the
rest of us (sob). Oh well, at least PT engineeredd a big
win (£15) on the roulette wheel for me to offset my losses.

Poker, poker, poker, poker, poker, poker.

1. Get a load of the poker table me and my stepdad built my bro xmas day! Admittedly it was much more down to him and I basically played a 'high level' role (e.g. "yes, that's a good idea John") but it turned out soooooo well. It's the greatest thing since sliced wombat.

From this...........
.....to this!

2. Look at this. I want a go. Click on number 4.

http://newsvote.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/funny_old_game/6200933.stm?dynamic_vote=ON#vote_sport_funnyvideos_28_12_2006

3. I finished 9th in a 28 person pub poker tournament last night with old pals (no offence meant girls) Rhonda and Vicci. I went out one place away from the final table and the money (doh). Vic crashed and burned just before me but poker hero Rhonda finished third and was only ko'd when her trip threes got busted by a flush. Gutted. A solid show by the crew generally though I think.

4. The casino poker night tonight in Manc with Trants and Mullock will be most agreeable.

5. Happy New Year to my many readers*.

* factually incorrect.

Two unimportant things

1. Me demonstrating my athletic prowess and golfing skills (or perhaps just attempting an ugly hack out the rough with a comedy stance on a work golf day).



2. I'm getting my stuff together for my trip back to Wales tomorrow and a film called Serendipity has been on in the background for the last half hour. Under no circumstances ever watch this terrible, terrible, terrible film.

3. I'm looking forward to this Sat in Manc muchly.

Ok, that's three unimportant things. I'm just putting off packing, aren't I? Might waste another few mins sticking a new lyric up.

Da boys in action

Return of the Manc.

Just had a nice few days in Manc, partaking in the following activities:

• BOOZING - though Le Trappiste was shut so it was curry, the Leigh Arms and Belge beers afterwards at Chez MWard. Most agreeable.
• SKIING - at a real fake snow place (if you know what I mean) near Leeds.
• LUMBERED - in a car with MWard, PT and Marie for hours following the M62 being shut.
• ENTERTAINED - by Tenacious D at the MEN with some of the old Manc crowd and 15,000 other punters.

A class mini break. Am so looking forward to Val Thorens in Jan. Some pics below. Vids will follow when I work out how to turn 3GP files to MPEG or something.

PT defying gravity with an 'Iron Cross 720 grab' big air.
Those who think he's just lying in the snow with his legs in the air
have been fooled by a trick of the light.
Me.
MWard ripping up the slope at 175mph. Those who think
he was stationary when this picture was taken have been
fooled by the glare from the snow.
Marie just before performing a double forward
somersault with 1 1/2 twists from the stunt ramp.

Lyric corner

Have spoken to three people in the last week about this song (Stone and Peps at a poker night and MM after he caught me singing it) all of who agree that it's a class song on a class album. It's also one of my fave songs ever, easily.

I thought it was about a prostitute but I've just seen a few internet sources saying that it's about the (bloke) lead singer's then girlfriend who was at the same time seeing another girl (not JF though). This is very plausible when you read all the lyrics.

Not amused.

Just got in from squash to be confronted with the following on BBC News:

"Equestrian star Zara Phillips was named BBC Sports Personality of the Year with an victory in a public vote."

The world had gone madder.

Am not doing much tonight - am home alone. Will play a spot of bet365 in the event of anyone fancying a bit. Let me know.

Hello, good evening and b-b-b-b-.....

.....b-b-b-BIRTHDAY. That man McE has excelled himself by posting this chap through my door for my birthday. Class.

Roger reporting from my bookshelf, yesterday.

That's not a quiz. THIS is a quiz.

Inspired by consistent success* on the quiz questions that OG puts up, I thought I’d strut my stuff at a real live quiz for the first time in a while. Was a good one as well – a manager organised xmas quiz/jolly hosted by former University Challenge host Bamber Gascoigne, who I’ve heard of but can’t remember ever being on it. Probably because it's poncy and rubbish and I don't ever watch it.

Apart from the slight administrative error that meant I had to sit in a table full of randoms (had a name badge, my name was on the seating list but there wasn’t a place name for me at the table – sob) it was a blast. The questions set by a professional quiz setting company and there were loads of sound effects, pictures and video questions etc. And there was massive bucket in the middle of the table full of iced beer. Smashing.

I can remember a few questions but most of them are easy. One that I thought was easy but no one else on my table got (and no one on the table I was supposed to be on – who were the winning team got either) was:

“What is the name of the caramel and chocolate covered chocolate bar whose price has remained at 10p for the last 10 years?”

Easy street.

The team I was supposed to be on won following a tie breaker with Spencer Bowen from Watsons (email him about this McK!) and I therefore have a bottle of champagne to glug which I may do.....

****ON MY BIRTHDAY TOMORROW.****

Our guy was the quickest to get:

“How many grooves are there on one side of an old LP record?”

How long did it take you? Basically an instant answer from our man.

The winning team and the ringer (i.e. me).

Bamber babbling.

Star know it all Gavin accepts the award.

* failure

Hit. By. Beer. Juggernaut.

Someone email me to ask me about this. Never again. I haven't been this bad in quite some time.